ADHD Made Me Do It

Survive Life with Laughter

Changer – Danger!

on January 28, 2016

I started following this blog – Be Like Water– which pointed me to the blog – Alphabet Salad – which encourages me to write about the chosen word to represent 2016 and my word is…….CHANGE!

From Change Part of Speech: noun

Definition: something made different; alteration

Synonyms: adjustment, conversion, correction, development, difference, distortion, diversification, diversity, innovation, metamorphosis, modification, modulation, mutation, novelty, permutation, reconstruction, refinement, remodeling, reversal, revision, revolution, shift, surrogate, switch, tempering, transformation, transition, transmutation, turn, turnover, variance, variation, variety, vicissitude

Personally I didn’t know there were that many synonyms for CHANGE…and I quite like the sound of “Vicissitude”. I think I will use that word more often!

Anyhow, while searching for the right word, I kept being reminded of the “serenity prayer”

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot CHANGE,

The courage to CHANGE the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.”

It was like my ADHD self was yelling at me that this prayer is everything I need to know in life for the next year…this is how I will use my magical powers for good this year!”

I feel that every aspect of my life can do with a bit of a CHANGE-over…whether it be a physical CHANGE or a mental CHANGE or just a CHANGE of perspective.

There is so much that has happened in the last couple of years, and although I have reflected often about what has happened and how to continue moving forward with life….I still find myself caught in a bit of a circle of reactions and thoughts and beliefs about certain aspects of life….and perhaps 2016 is the time for CHANGE!!

Recently, that pesky cancer fuckaroo has claimed more and more lives…especially more and more famous entertainers and even some people personally known to me (I mean the very same naturopathic doctor that did my vitamin C treatments passed away from the pesky fuckaroo….I am not sure he embraced the magical powers of crazy positivity)

The lesson here is that I cannot CHANGE the way or the people that are touched and affected by the pesky fuckaroo….but I can CHANGE my reaction to its touching effects. I can ensure that I don’t feed it any of the negativity it wants….I can promise it that though it may touch those around me….it will not take me down…take me out….instead I am still the Wiser one that accepts the knowledge that I can still make the CHANGE in my body and mind to eradicate pesky fuckaroos from my existence!

Zougy and I have been having many discussions on building our future….and though he is presently embracing the “list the lists to list the list that will help to breakdown the best list” zone….I am trying to embrace the lets just start getting on with setting a goal and achieving the goal to set the next goal to achieve!

The lesson here is that I can CHANGE my reaction….which should really be the less stressful response to his chosen list insanity! I know that I function with setting and achieving goals and doing multiple goals at a time….he is a boy who is struggling to multi-task and find his feet in this new ground with husband, parent, homeowner, business owner, full time employee, all other wobblies life throws at him! I have decided that instead of getting frustrated with how he does things not my way…..I will CHANGE to encourage him to achieve the way he feels he can best achieve! I will CHANGE to encourage him to build his relationships with people in his life and he is responsible for the outcomes…not I….cause I have ADHD and not worldly controlling magical powers (that is a CHANGE I am struggling with a little…cause I really did hope one day I could be Ruler of the Earth…but wisdom to accept that won’t happen has arrived in my brain!)

Recently, I was finally asked to clear out the personal items from my desk at work. Though I am not sad about this…and feel that it was due to happen soon enough….I feel like there is some CHANGE in the acceptance of it!

The lesson here is that I clung to the “I will be coming back to work so just leave everything the way it is”…but for real after a whole year being off…it is unfair to just assume that my desk space and office zoo be left there to be taken care of by others…..and who can really look after another person’s office zoo for unlimited time?? So, I have come to accept that I do plan to return to work one day….but understand that it may be a CHANGE in role….that I may not sit at the same desk or surrounded by the same team or even involved in the same role….but that is ok…cause it could be positive….it WILL be positive.

Family……ohh how family can CHANGE or how we grow older and CHANGE our dealings with family. I have finally come to figure out that I am older now…I have my own family to contend with….inlaws and family friends that I don’t necessarily get along with or that don’t get along with me. In laws and new found family friends that I do get along with and want to surround myself with more and more.

The lesson here is that I finally have the power to CHANGE my response to having to attend a family event at the request of my parents. I realize that I will always be the child of my parents….but I am also the rebellious child of my parents that grew up and can CHANGE who I incorporate into my circle and it doesn’t have to be the parent’s family friends that always talked shit behind my back….I get to CHANGE my reaction to them and not be around them…..that is an awesome lesson to learn….truth be told an even awesomer feeling first time saying “no I ain’t going there to see them”!

Finally, we come back to me and the CHANGE in my cancer fuckaroo…we have all heard that I will beat the fuckaroo out….it will not claim me as one of its victories at least for another 50 years…now I up the game Cancer Fuckaroo and I say you can’t get me for another 55 years…..bah hah hah ha!

The lesson here is that I do need to make serious CHANGE to my physical diet to ensure that I am eating healthy enough to gain necessary weight (yes I am trying to get fat…which will help the hair grow better and maybe even some of the boobies grow back)! I need to continue my serious CHANGE in attitude that I can and will create an environment within my mind and body to cause a metamorphosis of cancerous cells to healthy kick ass cells!!

My final thoughts:

Why provide myself with such negative surround sound!  I realize that God is all knowing and all forgiving and all things good and gave me free will….Why am I willing the negativity? It is within my control and my grasp and my will to bring about positivity…to CHANGE my outlook and viewpoint and angle on life and events in life….from the negative to the positive…..after all isn’t that the Big Secret!!!

It is A Dangerous time for the Pesky Cancer Fuckaroo!

It is an Exciting time for my Life!!


One response to “Changer – Danger!

  1. Laurel Regan says:

    So glad you joined in on the word of the year linkup! I wish you a wonderful 2016 as you embrace change. 🙂


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